18th June 2009

Tasks 51/ Learn to play the Drums

Above is the sheet of music which I learnt to play during my first drum lesson last Saturday. My next lesson is tomorrow and I have been practicing the beats from this piece of paper on my lap at every chance I have had. I have previously played both the guitar and violin before giving up because I was young and an idiot, I would love to be able to play both of those now. Despite having only had one lesson I really enjoyed myself and hopefully this is something that I will stick to and really get something out of. I feel like this is something I can do, and do well at if I just give it a good shot.

17th June 2009

This little friend is my second tattoo, and also my very, very late 19th Birthday present (am now 20) from Charlie. Originally my little ladybug was meant to have 19 dots, to celebrate the end of my teenage-hood, instead she has 20 and marks a friendship and a coming of age I didn't want to happen but am so glad did. This tattoo was supposed to be my first one, however I am glad I got my "Advenutre" one first and waited until, at last, a year later for a time when both me and Charlie could go and get tattoo's together. Yes, that is how little we get to see each other. I was so happy to be there when Charlie got her first tattoo, the words "Sunday Girl" on the inside of her right wrist, a tribute to Blondie, her biggest idol. 

The band on my wrist is from Kings of Leon the evening before, which along with this tattoo will always remind me of Charlie and how we have grown together and as individuals. 

16th June 2009

Today I saw one of my all time favourite bands, Kings of Leon at The O2 Arena in London with my two best friends. Charlie, who I have known for nearly 4 years and Michelle who I met when I first came to University in September, the two don't know each other and are rather different to each other yet both mean a lot to me in very similar ways. I rely on them both a lot, and cherish both of them as dear friends, without whom I don't know where I would be today. And in Charlie's case, who I would be today. 

Kings of Leon absolutely blew me out of the water like I knew and hoped they would, they are just incredible and everything a great band should be. I have loved them for a long time and hopefully always will. Dancing around with Charlie, shouting the lyrics out like our lives depended on it and knowing we were ridiculously drunk, like we always are when we go and see bands is just the best feeling. Its just what we do. Next week Charlie and I are going to see Jamie. T, another musician who is so good live you just won't believe it until you go and experience it for yourself. I can't wait!

15th & 16th June 2009

Task 22/ Have a piece of work published a year

With this task I've sort of out done myself as a piece I wrote on the Style on The Downs competition at Epsom Racecourse where I live has so far been published twice with the possibility of it also being used  on the racecourse's website. And it's only 6 weeks into my new year, I have quite possibly peeked far too early on this task, however I can keep on striving for new things to write about and new opportunities to present themselves. 

If you follow this link to my other blog you can see the article in full and where it was published: 

http://ilovekittykiller.co.uk/style-on-the-downs/

As you can read I am not very happy with the first place it was published, as they have completely changed the piece to something I don't like. However my University have put it on the Uni's website as a student success for 2009, along with the girl who won this years First Word Journalism Award at Graduate Fashion Week this year, something I would love to be nominated for, let alone win. I am over the moon they have put it up there, and am shocked at the range of reactions a style report piece like has received.

Tuesday 12th May 2009

Task 37/ Get my first tattoo

This is my first tattoo, the word "Adventure" across the inside of my left bicep. I cannot tell you how hard it was to take a picture of this but it looks so good and I am in love with it. Getting a tattoo has been something I have wanted to do for a long before I was of the legal age to have one done. Many years of watching Miami Ink and idolizing rock stars covered in the things gave me a taste for them in a massive way and I am so glad I have finally started my collection. I think this tattoo was a great way to begin, its quite hidden so I don't always have to show it off, and it has a lot of meaning to me. In relation to both the tasks I have set myself and my belief that you have to grasp each opportunity by the balls and make the most of everything life throws at you, do everything and enjoy it and be all that you can be. Don't sit back and wait for things to happen, put yourself out there and get it started.

Excuses...

So, snooze, I haven't blogged this website in about 3 weeks. This is partly because of two reasons...

 

1/ I have misplaced the hand written, illustrated, photograph and polaroid including diary I have been keeping for myself while on this adventure.

2/ I have been so busy with going to and from a myriad of places, seeing people I haven't seen in far too long and getting some work published.

Am devastated about reason 1, hopefully my diary is in my bedroom at my parents house and not left on a train somewhere because of reason 2.

So I will give you a brief, photograph-less summary (I use disposable cameras unless it's something big and am using my Nikon D40) of what I have been up to!

This was my 19th Birthday 

This was my 18th Birthday 

This was my 17th Birthday

This was my 16th Birthday

The photographs from my 20th Birthday party will be developed tomorrow, however my actual Birthday is on Saturday 30th May. I plan to spend the day with my family and at my brothers University Graduation show, something quite different from what I have done over the past 4 years. I see this as a sign of my exit from teenager-hood in the sense of my age. However as a new friend on mine recently said "I'm 20 now, but mentally I am still a teenager and think I still will be until the age of around 25. And even then I will only leave it kicking and screaming..."

I've been dreading no longer being a teenager since before I even turned 19, and I am still scared. However I am beginning to see it as a new era, in which I will hopefully feel more like myself in, a change I welcome.

This evening I realised that I have been desperately looking and waiting for somebody to come along and make me forget about all the things I dislike about myself with their own inner and outer beauty. I should instead concentrate on all the things I want and need to be, that I know I can and will be.  

I first discovered this secret on post secret many, many years ago. When I fist found it I probably would have hoped that by now, days before my 20th birthday I would have reached a happy place. I am happy, but there is so much more for me than I have now. I must always strive to be a better person, to who I will eventually be remembered as when I am gone. 

This evening I went on a ghost tour of Epsom, the town in which I live at University, with 4 of my closest friends here. After much laughing around and being silly we began to drive back home when all of a sudden my friend in the passenger seat inhaled so fast and jumped as the car bumped violently upwards from the right side. A sickening almighty crunch accompanied this movement. The next second I heard "we've hit a badger" and absolute uproar ensued while we decided what on earth to do next. The badger had literally run out right in front of the car and gone straight under the wheels so quickly that nothing could be done to save it. 

We went back to the badger moments later and saw that, thankfully, we had killed it straight away. I have no idea what on earth any of us would have done if the poor thing was still alive. We went home to fetch a spade and then back to where the badger was to move it as cars were swerving all over the road to miss hitting it again. However not every car did, and twice we heard a disgusting crunch of bones and thud against the oncoming cars that didn't care enough to make sure they didn't hit a huge object in the road.  

Eventually we moved the badger out of the road and headed home for hot drinks and to calm down, I had to stop myself being sick and/or crying while the cars hit as we tried to move the badger to the curb. While drinking our hot brews we were talking about what had just happened and how precious life is, one moment you can be laughing and joking and the next there is death and hysteria. One of my friends mentioned that she has lost her passion for life, that she doesn't spend any time doing things that she wants to do and spending time by herself, for herself.

I think however horrifying and disgusting this evening may have been, that it has at least showed me how suddenly things can change. I will take a positive from this by remembering that every moment must be cherished and that these tasks are a good and positive thing for me.

I thought you needed saving, but in truth I wanted you to save me. It won't happen.

The leaving time came way to fast

I want you to collapse, so I can catch you

So I can make you see, that you belong to me

Stick me to you, nature needs no glue

Always be true.

I will make you see, that you belong to me

Stick me to you, nature needs no glue

I could hold you tighter, and I could make you lighter

Than the air you've been breathing.

I've started making plans, so come on give me a chance.

Always be true. Uh-Oh-Ay-Ya-Oh.

La la la.

I got a thinking, drinking, sinking, feeling.

Now I know you are not who I wanted at all. And I will be ok.